Thursday, June 23, 2016

Pit Bull Breedin' - Better than Havin' a Real Job!

Let me tell ya folks, I got an offer you just can't refuse.  For the price of readin' this post, you'll learn how ta set yourself up with a part time income to supplement your welfare check, your kitchen lab setup, or help you offset those traffic citations.  Hell, once this business gets rollin' for ya, you could even make a decent livin', provided you inherited a dirt patch in rural Missouri, or some such place that don't expect ya to pay much in property taxes.

I know some of you are thinking this is going to be waay too much effort and waay too much money ta get started, but you're wrong.  This'll be hardly any effort at all.  Just clean up some puppy poop (or not) and the occasional blood stain, an' you too can repeatedly post Pit Pups on CL for anywheres between $200 and $700 a head (in between gittin' flagged off for "prohibited posting").

An' them pups that don't sell 'fore they're no longer pup, can be "rehomed" as rescues by either you or your good friends needin' ta move where the mean, mean landlord won't allow 'em.

I tell ya, it's a killer deal.  All you gotta lay out is the price o' one Pit  bitch (or adopt one unspayed) 'n find yerself a Daddy dog down the road a piece. You can get yer stud fee waved for "pick 'o litter" (jus' don't ask what the man means 'bout looking for the most "game" pup), or better yet, ya can jus' stake yer Pit in heat out back an' come what may, cuz them Pit crosses are almost as good as them 100% ones.

And it gets even BETTER, cuz them Pittie Pups go out with an EXPIRY DATE of about two years, 'fore them families that bought 'em wind up offerin' them up on CL or havin' them run off or lose 'em cuz the neighbors can't stand 'em anymore and take matters into their own hands an' guess what...

A good percentage of those folks will be back at yer DOOR wantin' another one just like the pibblywibbly they got awhile back cuz, THERE'S NO BAD DOGS only BAD OWNERS an' this is their chance to redeem themselves.  There's a WHOLE DAMNED advertisin' MACHINE out there sayin' as much, over and over and over again, an' we all know if it ain't true, an' you repeat it enough, it becomes true by magic.

You can thank the HSUS, ASPCA, along with their less reputable brethren 'fore ADVERTISING the great FAMILY NATURE of your pups for FREE, so there will ALWAYS be more damned fools, I mean, potential customers, lookin' for these POOR, MISUNDERSTOOD puppies that you've so kindly produced for 'em.

But HURRY!  Folks are callin' for BSL EVERYWHERE, so you'd better git goin' while the gittin' is good!  With luck, you'l be able to pay fer that BIG SCREEN TV with yer first litter (an' 'fore your bitch goes all pit bull on yer ass).


  1. The sad part about this is that it is so true. SO MANY idiots. MO is almost, but not quite, the worst for puppy mills and back yard breeders in the U.S. And everyone loves a nice pibble, is it not true>

    1. Pits make a great cash crop. Guaranteed sales to pittle lovers, dog fighters or "adoption fees" to rescue angels. Plus, the high turn over from uncontrollable behavior, and you've got build in obsolescence.

      I don't thing there's a higher rate of return on any other breeding program outside of the meat trade.

    2. In addition to being a great cash crop, it is a tax free business. What's not to love?

    3. In addition to being a great cash crop, it is a tax free business. What's not to love?

    4. Tax free, insurance free, no employees, next to nuthin' to set up and you can start up anywhere. Even in your humble box under a bridge.

      I tell you, everybody's going to get in on this one, and by the looks of Craigslist, nearly everybody has.